Twin Citizen: A Band With a Unique Bond

The members of Minneapolis band Twin Citizen share more than a musical kinship. Four of the five are also connected by the bond of living in recovery from substance use and mental health challenges. Formed during the COVID-19 pandemic, Twin Citizen came together at a time when in-person social connections—and gigs—were hard to come by, supporting each other in more ways than one. The band emerged with songs, good health and gratitude, and has been playing shows throughout Minneapolis and St. Paul in 2022.

Dissonance checked in with the group—Joe Hartley (vocals and rhythm guitar), Adam Lifto (lead guitar), Paul Narlock (bass) Will Hanson (keys) and Joe Diaz (drums)—to learn more about their experiences with sobriety, recovery and music. The band members demonstrated how tight they are by responding to our Q&A as a group. Enjoy, and check out the band’s new music and show schedule at twincitizenmnmusic.com and on all major social platforms.

How have you experienced dissonance in your life?

The four of us in recovery all experienced dissonance during our stints of active addiction and unmanaged mental health disorders , which not only affected our physical health but also our deeply held individual beliefs, values and conceptions of self, leaving us feeling disjointed and unwell. Life is complex, but when habitual chemical use is added to the mix of unmitigated mental health symptoms, it becomes especially complicated and excruciatingly difficult to be in harmony at one’s core.  What often happened, in our experience, is that the logical part of our brains would say, “I don’t want to use chemicals again, and I certainly do not want to experience the consequences associated with my use.” But the primal part of the brain would have other plans, and despite every intention of following logical thought, we would travel right down the same ole’ road again. As you can imagine, after years, or decades, of beating down that path, you can easily lose sight of who you are, what you believe about yourself and the world, and how to maintain the confidence and ability to ensure your behaviors match your values and beliefs. 

How do you stay well, and what does that mean to you?

One of the problems many of us faced when we were struggling with addiction and mental health conditions was attempting to assert control over the circumstance in our lives. The endless attempts to control everything created distress, and when things were outside of our control—which was often the case—we had a great excuse to check out and go back to the familiar pattern of addictive use.  Therefore, for all of us, getting out of our own way and living life on life’s terms is the pathway to appropriate responses to what life has to throw at us. Having balance in life is extremely important. Taking care of our mental and physical health; connecting to the recovery community; and playing, writing and performing music have all been essential to us individually and as a group. Family involvement and support, and maintaining a spiritual practice, have also helped us stay well. Additionally, in the band, mutual respect and keeping open lines of communication are driving forces for everything we do. We have a group chat that is constantly blowing up all our phones day in and day out.

How can a healthy community best be fostered in your area of the arts?

The Minnesota music scene is a vibrant and accepting community that is open to lots of different musical ideas and cultural differences. It has also been our experience that many in the music industry struggle with addiction and mental health issues. Contributing factors include the club/bar environment, anxiety issues associated with playing live, and the glorification of the hard-partying rock star. Twin Citizen exists in contrast to the stereotypes. Not only do we actively support each other’s recovery, but we also embrace the possibility that our example might help others. We want to support fellow musicians who may be struggling with substance use and/or mental health disorders. For many of us, the idea of writing, recording and playing music live without the use of chemicals, at one point in time in our lives, seemed impossible and terrifying.  Twin Citizen has made it possible for us to be fully immersed and present in our musical journeys, which has truly been a blessing.  

Why is the Dissonance mission important?

In our experience, meaningful creative output goes hand-in-hand with wellbeing. In the past, a majority of the band members grinded through creative output while depleting our mental and physical health only to find ourselves unable to pursue personal creative goals. Providing a safe place for people to express, discuss and seek support for the challenges they face is integral to empowering wellbeing in the artistic community. Changing cultural stereotypes, creating public awareness of the real challenges we artists face, and de-stigmatizing substance use and mental health disorders helps make a healthier, more supportive, and more creative environment. The need is clear. All you have to do is watch the news to realize we are losing talented individuals to addiction and mental health disorders way too often. We were blessed with the help of others in our own individual lives and, in many ways, are examples of what can happen when artists sidelined by addiction and mental health disorders get support and are able to find balance and wellbeing. The superpower of recovery allows us to be the best version of ourselves. That’s why we support and are excited to be part of the Dissonance mission.

How can Dissonance meet the needs of our community?

Providing a forum for stories like ours is one important way to serve the community, and we’re grateful for that opportunity. Providing a safe environment for artists to share their truth regarding the very real struggle that exists for many of us and to access the resilience and recovery potential that we all possess is very helpful. We also appreciate that Dissonance provides opportunities for artists to perform or share their work with the community it serves and to network and support one another. Twin Citizen looks forward to getting more involved and sharing both our music and our lived experience as artists in recovery.

Twin Citizen · Kimmy Gibbler

Meet New Dissonance Board Member Hyedi Nelson

Dissonance is excited and grateful to welcome Hyedi Nelson as our newest board member. Hyedi is an account director specializing in health strategy at Bellmont Partners, a full-service communications and PR agency in Edina, Minnesota. Not only is she a communications and networking pro with experience in fundraising and events, but she also brings prior experience serving on the boards of Faith’s Lodge, the Minnesota Health Strategy and Communications Network, and Girls on the Run - Twin Cities. We are thrilled Hyedi has joined the team as a leader and ambassador for our mission to promote health and wellness in and through the arts, and we’re happy to introduce you to her in this Q&A …

How did you hear about Dissonance and what attracted you to the mission?

I first heard about Dissonance when Justin Courtney Pierre was donating proceeds from his My Girl Margot 7” to the organization. From there, I eventually connected with Dissonance Co-founder and Board Chair Sarah Souder Johnson on something related to one of the clients I was working with for my day job. I was immediately drawn to Dissonance because the organization is addressing, head on, such important needs within the creative arts community. I’m excited to join the Dissonance board because of my passion for health — and a special interest in mental health — as well as for the music and creative arts space. 

You experienced the unimaginable grief of losing your firstborn child several years ago. What would you like to share about Charlie and how his loss has shaped you in the years since?   

Losing Charlie completely fucked with my understanding of what the world was up until that point. After he died, absolutely nothing seemed to make sense anymore. I already had anxiety issues, but suddenly I was constantly on edge – because, like…my baby died. Any other “worst-case scenario” seemed not only possible now, but constantly imminent. And then, unfortunately, this experience was followed by another major trauma in my life with the death of my father a couple of years later. It’s an ongoing process of healing and grieving, but these experiences have definitely led to a shift in my mindset of what’s truly important and what’s not really that big of a deal.

EDITOR’S NOTE: In 2020, Hyedi channeled her grief into advocacy by organizing the Concert for Charlie, which raised funds and awareness to help others who experience child loss.

What role has music and/or other art played in your life?

Music was almost a profession for me – not as a performer, but I went to college wanting to work in the music industry. I ultimately decided to go in a different direction, but music has still continued to be a mainstay in my life. Going to see live music is probably my favorite thing in the entire world. I like bringing live music home, too, and hosted three concerts in my backyard last summer (Jeremy Messersmith, Chris Koza and Stephen Kellogg). Music has been one of the ways I’ve made a lot of meaningful connections with some pretty incredible people. 

If therapy or peer support (aka mutual aid) have been a part of your life experience, in what ways have either or both been helpful?

I don’t know where I’d be without therapy. Therapy has been a part of my life since early adulthood and I sing its praises to anyone who’ll listen. I recently embarked on a new chapter in my therapy journey, making a shift from mostly psychotherapy to adding in some “somatic” work, which has been an extremely helpful experience so far. My mental health struggles tend to manifest in an extremely physical way, so the mind-body connection that is the focus of this kind of therapy makes a lot of sense to me.

What positive experiences have you had with sobriety?

My personal experience with sobriety has been pretty limited so far, and it’s a journey that I’m still exploring as I figure out the right path for me. Even so, the benefits I’ve experienced so far have been honestly remarkable. It’s a long list, but the two benefits that have had the biggest impact on my life are a significant decrease in anxiety and an ability to be more present. I’m not sure what my long-term journey will look like, but it’s clear my relationship with alcohol will be different than what it’s been for the past two decades of my life.

How have you experienced or witnessed stigma associated with mental health and/or substance use issues?

I was adopted when I was six months old and grew up in rural Wisconsin. I didn’t realize it then, but mental health and substance use issues were something I grew up around. Both issues simply weren’t talked about – and definitely not addressed until they became so acute, or severe, they were unavoidable, such as when they contributed to the death of one of the most important people in my life.

We understand you play a variety of instruments. Which ones, and which is your favorite?

I play the flute, guitar and piano. Of those, I’m most proficient at the flute, but I’ve really been enjoying the piano as of late!

How do you stay well?

Movement, sleep and meds. I’m not the runner that I used to be, but I’ve been finding a ton of joy recently in incorporating movement into my day vs. always needing to exercise vigorously. I vary it up more now. Things like yoga, walking, lifting weights, cross-country skiing, kayaking, stand-up paddle-boarding – they all keep me feeling good. And I love sleep. I firmly believe I’m one of those people who require more sleep than most, so as I’ve gotten older, I’ve been working hard to really try and honor that and get as much of it as possible. Finally — for me, personally, medication is also a necessary component of my wellness!